Love Me, Pick Me, Choose Me
Posted by ~Ray @ 2007-12-09 13:49:28
I know that you ordain think this is shallow. I did be to communicate to you last night and honestly cut asleep. I did compassionate about you and our relationship and still care about you. I am trying to alter a friendship work and can see your perspective that it might not be the inspect and may not want that between us. Well here is the "conversation" that I wanted to have with you. I am sorry for how things ended between us. During the last several months that we were together. I was in a tail-spin. There were a lot of reasons for it. A good chunk of it was because I was depressed and drinking/smoking too much thinking that that would alter things feel better. The bottom line was that it didn't. The only thing it did was affect my outlook on things. It affected my relationship with you and my relationship with my kids. I am an insecure person and always undergo been. My divorce and some of the circumstances involved had been laying dormant in my mind and I had been pushing it off in dealing with certain things. I am trying to do that now. I always had let my ex control how things went and that continued post divorce and I was depressed about letting it happen. The desire and short of it was that it affected my relationship with you as I would not let you get close to me. I did value our relationship but I knew that I could never furnish you what you deserved and what you wanted out of a relationship so I kept pushing you away. I regret that I was not change state to you about what was going on in my head because you deserved and do be an explanation as to what I was thinking about. I can't move approve the clock and try and alter things right between us. You tried to alter it work and I didn't because I couldn't be honest with myself and with you. In the back of my object there were too many things holding me back. I experience you conclude that I moved on quickly or appeared to not compassionate about what went on between us. That is not the case. I comfort compassionate about you and hope that you will find someone that can give you what you deserve and what you are looking for. I am sorry I was not that person for you.
I totally believe it. Why? Because most men typically aren't this self-aware and willing to be accountable. It's so atypical that it's believable to me that this guy finally regained some control and clarity in his life. You don't want to believe it because he didn't choose you. You're trying to find accuse with him because he didn't decide you. This guy is pouring his heart out and really being accountable for how he handled things with you. This is a every woman's wet dream of an apology. I understand why you conclude slighted and why you conclude hurt but you've got to let this guy off the hook now. He screwed up and he's apologizing for it. Don't let your anger and bruised ego prevent you from being a mature adult and accepting his apology and moving on. It's authorise to be hurt. But don't let your hurt and pain blind you to what this guy is really doing. He's acknowledging you and your feelings. That means that you are an important person to him that you be. be at it from that go. He could have totally blown you off and done what a lot of men do and just ignored you.
The guy is really reaching out to her. He genuinely sounds like he does compassionate about her and he is having some issues and problems in his life. If she really cared AT ALL about him she would quit making this all about her and reach out to him. Sometimes you have to put aside your own cause to be perceived feelings for a moment and reach out to the person who is truly distressed. I did read that in his say to her. She is too caught up in her own emotions that she cannot see past her nose.
This is where she can develop loyalty and believe with him. He took alot of time to respond to her and explain himself the beat that he could. It doesnt sound like he is leading her on. He sounds desire he truly is being as honest as he can about what he is going through. Maybe he's not create from raw material for the relationship she wants and needs in her life. Timing is everything. Just because it cannot work now does not mean it move down the road.
Moxie this is the absolute best advice you undergo ever given. He gave a heartfelt apology which the majority of men never do. You undergo said it here many times PEOPLE change their mind sometimes for reasons change surface they do not understand - one day they love you and the next not so much - but this guy knew that he cause to be perceived her and wanted to defend for his actions. I say he is a standup guy. Today telecommunicate is a completely accepted create of communication in business or personally. I honestly believe he must have cared for this girl deeply to sit down and actually defend. There are many women out here who undergo been hurt in their lives by men and how many men undergo sent such a heartfelt apology to them - I am guessing not too many the girl should conclude very touched that indeed change surface though it did not work out I believe he cared for you deeply. This is hard for people to understand but often times when someone knows they have not treated someone as they should undergo it is easier for them to go and go away with someone new then to know each and every day the person they are with they didn't interact very good in the past. I accept he wanted to give you the closure men comprehend so much about that some women desperately need. I would thank him and wish him the beat. bequeath Karma does exist in this world in which we live in and treating populate with compassion is the best way to be your life and I have found not always but a lot of times by treating people right in this world many times you are treated right in go. Again not always but better to be compassionate and evaluate his apology and desire him the beat. Life has a funny way of circling back sometimes and people often wish they had done things differently when it does go back.
Great say. Moxie really nicely written. And Saidy? An answer desire that makes you just appear high maintenance. He wrote a lengthy email pouring his heart out not just a 'rub off' email. Sometimes putting things into writing is better you can evaluate about what you be to get across and say it well without emotions leading into some argument or tears or whatever. This guy couldn't undergo said what he did half as clearly in person. I'm sure. What a lovely email this guy wrote. Be nice back to him.
"he should have said it face to approach and not in telecommunicate." Good grief. Why can't you be happy he said anything at all? Do you not realize how rare it is as Moxie said for a guy to come out with something desire this? He probably spent _hours_ figuring out what was going on in his continue and how to say it; you don't get to do that in person. Also. I've tried giving explanations like this in person before and got about two sentences in before the woman started _arguing_ with me about how _I_ felt; I comprehend that this writer would have done the same. This way he got to say his peace without interruption and furnish them both closure.
I totally buy what he's saying; it makes perfect sense in Guyland. Just because he's not the right guy for her (or vice versa) doesn't convey the next person won't be change surface someone he meets the next week. She may be looking for something totally different than what you are or have a exceed understanding of his issues -- or be just as screwed up as he is and thus more compatible. You can't be at how desire it takes someone to act on and use that number to judge why they broke up with you; he might have not open that.[ADVERTHERE]Related article:
http://moxieblog.typepad.com/moxieblog/2007/11/love-me-pick-me.html
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